Written by: Podunker
1. Sometimes I'm right handed, sometimes I'm a lefty. The master sword is too heavy to swing it with one hand all the time!
2. All this time travel has really taken it's toll on me. Has anyone seen an ear laying around in the Dark World?
3. No comment on the alleged Saria - Zelda love triangle.
4. This is already more than I've ever spoken before. Usually I just grunt, yelp and yell "Come On!"
5. I'm actually nothing special. If I was a dungeon boss, I wouldn't keep the only weapon capable of killing me in my house.
6. I hate chickens. I learned a long time ago that it is a bad idea to hit too many of them with my sword though…
7. No, I'm not immortal. Link has been a pretty popular name throughout Hyrule's history. They've all been heroes somehow.
8. I know where there's a pool that you can throw stuff in, lie about it, and then tell the truth to get some pretty cool gear.
9. I can't believe they kicked me off the Kokiri tee-ball team when they found out I was actually Hylian. I guess it was pretty obvious when I had to start slouching to hit the ball.
Who ran to help me when I fell,
And would some pretty story tell,
Or kiss the place to make it well?
My mother.
—Ann Taylor (1782–1866)
10. Anyone know where I can pawn a mirror shield? I need some cash for some stupid flippers. 500 Bucks? Give me a break.
11. I've killed more pigs than Johnsonville.
12. Nice shirt. Can it make you resistant to fire though?
13. At first I was excited to have a talking fairy around. That is, until she wouldn't shut up. I still wake up hearing "Hey! Look! Hey! Look!"
14. Most people know me for being an expert at playing the Ocarina. Did you know that I am also a Theremin virtuoso?
15. It must suck to wait thousands of years in a room barely big enough to fit in only to be defeated by a kid in a little green hat.
View article images here
16. Turning into a bunny was by no means fun. I don't recommend you forget about the Moon Pearl if you plan on vacationing in the Dark World.
17. I was finally arrested last month for breaking people's pots and stealing their heart.
18. Kakariko Village is a lot smaller than I was told. Maybe it's because it seems like people take forever to sweep their sidewalks and make glass bottles.
Now the nightingale, the pretty nightingale,
The sweetest singer in all the forest’s choir,
Entreats thee, sweet Peggy, to hear thy true Love’s tale:
Lo! yonder she sitteth, her breast against a briar.
—Thomas Dekker (1572?–1632?)
19. I have to make sure that I'm not at full health when I cut the grass. Last time I shot a beam into my neighbor's dog.
20. I had to sew some extra pockets in my Tunic to hold all those items. You can't see them but they're there. Iron boots are about as heavy as they sound.
21. Here's a tip: Milk from the Lon Lon Ranch never seems to expire. It's pretty reasonable too.
22. Has anyone seen a gold spider around here anywhere? I just need one more token…
23. I only need 1 more heart piece to get my 19th full heart. Wait. That makes a lot less sense when I say it out loud.
24. Mido is kind of a jerk. I wonder what he is up to these days.
25. Well, I wish I could talk more but I have to get to my weekly card game with Din, Nayru and Farore!
Game Podunk is an avid game community boosting positive gaming while helping gamers make informed decisions related to the changes of the industry.